"St. Louis! Come for our arch, and ... um ... we'll get back to you."
So it turns out that four in a row was the ceiling for the previously nigh-unstoppable Paul Maholm. It also turns out that the appearance of Kerry Wood in a close game makes me emit a high-pitched squealing noise for the time being. I have no idea what it is, but he's reaching deep and missing far. It's not enjoyable to watch, which is getting to be a shame. That ERA is still up past 8, which, ouch. And worse, we lost the opportunity to make the mouth-breathing Cardinals fans in our families and workplaces shut the holy fuck up. Those people are the worst, our colleagues and loved ones. The worst.
To be fair, no one came out particularly well in the wacky game. Russell gave up a go-ahead homer to Matt Carpenter in the 8th, and Dolis blew the whole deal to that bastard Yadier Molina. It's a shame when we get a 9 hit, 5 run performance from Kyle Loshse and still manage to lose the game. But so goes the bullpen this year.
Remember the concerns everyone expressed about Anthony Rizzo's ability to hit at the big league level? That he might move on from the hitter-friendly PCL and just look 100 percent over his head? It's tough to envision exactly what form that would take, but my guess is that it looks a lot like Wellington Castillo at the plate.
It's getting cliche to keep typing "hey, how about this Bryan LaHair fella?" into a Cubs blog, so I'm just moving on ... to dwell on Kerry Wood's 2012 a little more.
Specifically, I would greatly enjoy seeing Woody take a game at home against the White Sox, or the Cards, or even the Reds, and just dominate an inning on the way to the win. Then he walks out to the mound, drops the mic, and walks off. That would be bitchin'-awesome. This year's not going to tarnish my view of the man. Even Santo had a year with the White Sox.