The Chicago Cubs: Like an Emo Song

The only offensive highlight of the series so far. Don't watch this series near a bridge or open fifth-floor window. The urge will be too great.

I love the Chicago Cubs - have since I was a little kid wearing my straight-billed Cubs hat (before this was the style, mind you) and a windbreaker two sizes too big to little league practice. I could walk the route to the park from the North, West, or South with my eyes closed and a head full of ether. I'll watch the Cubs play the Orioles AAA team in a field behind a high school if necessary.

All that being said, this team is making me hate the shit out of the Cubs for a couple hours most nights. No hitting, no excitement, no hope. Literally the only thing to do is watch the prospects and hope you don't see a call to the pen for Zombie Bob Howry and his girl-arm of death. So yes, I still love the Cubs, and plan to continue going to games (some might say 7 already demonstrates mental illness). But fuck do I hate what they're doing, and how they're run. The Ricketts have been awful (more on this soon), the management is so lackadaisical you wonder if they think they're managing another team. The players have nothing but room-temperature platitudes. I hate them. But I love them. Just like a shitty emo song.