We Have Answered Philosophy!

Thursday, September 10, 2009

We Have Answered Philosophy!

. Thursday, September 10, 2009

I took a few philosophy classes during my undergradute years. Along with geology, bowling, ju jitsu (twice), and sex ed. Fucking gen-ed requirements. But only philosophy had the unanswerable questions, the great queries and quandaries of this universe. But for one of them, I have an answer. Specifically, the great and powerful "How many bobbleheads is too many?"

It's this many, exactly:

I know this because after years of seeing various thing like my Willie Nelson bandanna/flag, MCA Chicago exhibit brochure pictures, ticket stubs, Hellboy statue, autographed baseballs, and other various bric-a-brac, I finally got a reaction from my boss. It was the other week, after Billy Williams bobblehead day made the count on my desk 7. I don't work for an ad agency or search engine, so I'm clearly a cubicle outlier. He doesn't usually comment on these things, as he's more concerned with my doing my job correctly than my disturbingly childlike desk. Of course there are limits - should I start keeping a clown suit in my desk and driving a white van to work, then there might be issues. But at that point, what promotional items are on my desk really doesn't matter. But at the sight of Billy's box, he said, more disbelieving than judging "Another bobblehead?" Indeed. There was bemused head-shaking.

Now we know the answer is seven. Of course, all seven are still snug in the confines of my suburban desk. But what he doesn't know is that Fergie Jenkins bobblehead night is coming up. And I've got tickets.


Richard said...

I find my character strangely under-developed in this story. Am I the "he" who "doesn't matter"? Interesting.

I can't wait to meet Fergie!

John said...

Yeah, a lot of that got cut out. I think I fixed it. Had to do so from memory.