Cubs Win, Cards Lose, Sox Don't Play...My Kind of Opening Day

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Cubs Win, Cards Lose, Sox Don't Play...My Kind of Opening Day

. Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Milton Bradley celebrates by break-dancing to "Hammer Don't Hurt 'Em"

Expectations for the season were set 2 pitches into the game when Soriano hit a lead-off home run against Roy Oswalt, thus enforcing our position that he belongs in the 1 spot. I'm glad we knocked around Oswalt, as always sounded like he could be a serial killer, especially when invoking his middle name: Roy Edward Oswalt. Watch out Mr. President! On our side, Zambrano finally got the Opening Day victory he has waited 5 years for. I must admit, he looked pretty good (and, begrudgingly, so did SIEG HEILMAN!), and if he can get off to a strong start, we could build an early lead in the division, which will give up much more flexibility later in the season.

This image should surely become his baseball card

The Soriano homer allowed Fukudome to escape scrutiny for the first at bats. Then late in the game, I saw him flailing for another pitch, missing almost certainly, and it hit me: he has no business batting 2nd. Does he even belong in the lineup? I wouldn't be surprised if Reed Johnson gets the start tonight. Especially when you consider the fact that Lou pulled Fukudome for Joey Gathright late in the game for defense. So, to recap, we don't trust him batting, we don't trust him in center, but he is happy with his new translator. That puts me at ease. $44 million at ease.

Malibu Mike: Get on Board!

This post would not be complete without an ode to Malibu Mike Fontenot. We are unabashed fans here at WAIW. He finished the day batting .750, making him a formidable threat for the batting title. It has made me come up with what I like to call An Ode to 'Not:

Short and pudgy, he steps up to the plate
With a creole twang that is first rate
Down his helmet hangs his golden mane
So badass, he goes straight in the right only lane
The combination fills me with glee
So hear it now and get on board
Malibu Mike, our new Lord

Here's to a great season of Cubs baseball!


Angry Mike said...

Nice pic of Milton. I laughed my ass off when he cartonwheeled for that ball.

How bout him rolling his ankle jogging out that fly out. Not hard to see why this guy is so injury prone.

Steve said...

i foresee some sort of in-field collision a la Hee-seop Choi in the near future.

jenzie1231 said...

LOL. agreeed all around. I much rather see Reed than FOOK. What was with Milton's catch? There was definitely no need for that weird cartwheel...

anyhoo...go cuuuuuubs!

Sam said...

Very nice poem.