WAIW Salute: Hunter Pence

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

WAIW Salute: Hunter Pence

. Tuesday, September 2, 2008

"Hey Hunter...you look like a 1920s fancy boy!"


As mentioned earlier, the WAIW staff had their annual company outing in the right field bleachers on Labor Day. I know a lot of people prefer the left field, to joke around with Soriano et al. However, the chance to be close to WAIW punching-bag Hunter Pence was too much of an opportunity to pass up (you may remember him from such scathing burns here and here). We were fortunate enough to be just 4 rows back - plenty close to hear our buzzed insults, that, in our opinion, only got funnier as the game progressed.


The aforementioned fancy boy comment started the game off right. This was proceeded by many chants of "FAAAAAANNNNNNNNCCCCCCCCCCYYYYYYYYYY BOOOOOOOOOOOOOY!" which made me laugh. Additionally, we tore into his chicken legs (see picture above) and recommended some good places to get calf implants. This was especially hilarious after he tripped up on the base path.

Pence, seen here trading baseballs for Magic: The Gathering playing cards


I have to hand it to the guy though. After he was thrown out by a mile trying to steal second, he came back to right field to a standing ovation, in which he proceeded to bow grandiosely. I gained as much respect as I could for someone named Hunter Pence.


In the end, he got the better of us, getting on base what seemed like every time he was at the plate. That didn't make the insults less humorous...including my favorite gem: "Hey Hunter...you're on my fantasy team! {long pause} MY FANTASY TEAM SUCKS!"

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